-image-For the Love of Fiction

April 3, 2007 | Read a Book, Just Me

Why did I do it? Could someone please explain this to me: What was I thinking?

I did the same thing one other time last week; except, that was only half as bad - that time I’d gone to bed by 2:30am. But, last night I was up till 5:30am reading a novel. Granted, it was a fabulous book, but still…

What I would like to know is, what’s wrong with me? Why couldn’t I put the book down at, say, the halfway point and simply pick it back up again tomorrow?

I really can’t afford to be this tired. Not only that, but I have nothing left to do in my free time today. That marks the fourth book I’ve finished in 24hrs (approx) over the last two weeks. I’m devouring them (or maybe they are devouring me).

It’s like I’m starving. I’m so hungry for fiction I know I should pace myself, but I just can’t resist shoving it all in my face at once. It’s been so long since I’ve allowed myself the luxury - maybe part of me is afraid I’ll suddenly pull the fiction away again and I’ll have to go back to quietly starving. That must be it; I’m trying to get in as much as I can while I know I can have it! (Of course, what I should be afraid of is that I’ll run out of great books to read - considering the rate I’m going through them.)

So far I’ve read: The Kindness of Strangers, The Five People you meet in Heaven, In Her Shoes, and Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe. Fabulous and rich reads all of them.

It’s not just the reading that’s getting away with me either. I’ve been writing. Fiction. Consistently. A month or so ago I decided I should actually make use of the writing exrcise books I had been aquiring and I started writing. Writing exercises. Writing spurts that suddenly come to me. I have written out ideas and sparks I’ve had for some time. All of it fiction.

I don’t know what I’m doing. It’s not like any of it is useable, it’s hardly even workable, but I’m writing, writing, writing anyway. I don’t know what’s happening with me, but, I can see the headline now:

Woman Consumed by Fiction!

(I think I need some sleep.)

-image-Disappointing Reading

March 4, 2007 | Read a Book, Just Me

Last week I finally started reading the first Dropped Threads book. I say finally because it had been on my “to read” list for about a year. I’d been at a dinner for women in business and the hostess read one of the stories to us; it was about a woman who began belly dancing at middle age. I found it inspiring and decided I should read the rest of the book.

There’s actually three books out now; they are a collections of short, non-fiction pieces from women talking about the things that women aren’t told or don’t talk about. They are a “coming out” on what it really means to be a woman.

I’ve had the book out of the library for over a month, but hadn’t made time to read it yet. So, I took it on my retreat with me. I figured there was nothing there to distract me from reading so it would be the perfect opportunity to immerse myself in it.

You know what? I was really disappointed. I wanted to like it, I really did. In fact, I actually debated with myself about whether I should give it up or keep reading; the argument being that I wasn’t being fair to the book as a whole if I hadn’t read all the stories.

Now, Wakizashi has almost never given up on a book (almost, I think he quit on one, which is a testament to just how bad the book was), I think he thinks it’s a form of sacriledge to not finish a book. I’m not quite as religious as he is about it, but it’s still rare for me to quit reading. At worst, I’m driven by a need to redeem the time I’ve already invested in it. The primary reason I quit on a book is because it was so boring I forgot I was reading it.

The truth is, the book was depressing. Stories of learning (later in life) not to pretend anymore, stories of childhoods lost, or young adulthood wasted. Even the stories that were meant to be positive felt like they were pulling me downward. It was a whole book that carried the spirit of everything women have lost or wrongly believed about themselves. One story ended with the author telling me she was happy, but I didn’t believe her, at least, I didn’t feel happy with her. (I think that was the last story I read.) I was hoping for just a few stories of joyful discoveries, and hopeful journeys. Although, I will confess to have not made it too far into the book; maybe the happy stories were all past the half-way mark?

In the end, what decided me was how the stories left me feeling. Why would I chooseto feel down if I didn’t have to? (Also an argument in why I skip some, apparently, good movies.) So I’m crossing the book off of my “to read” list and moving on to something new.

Anyone got any upbeat suggestions?

-image-I Got A Present!!

February 21, 2007 | Get Inspired!, Read a Book, Just Me

Jump Up & Down! Jump Up & Down!

There’s nothing better than REAL mail, with one of those package slips that says I need to go pick something up from inside the store (I live in a small town where mail is delivered to PO Boxes at a corner store). Today, I got two presents. The first from my mother: she gave me a Chinese Brush Painting Kit for Christmas, but the book was missing - the book arrived today (Wakizashi will be so excited to try it out). My other present was from Delia.

Create a Connection has a Monday Swap theme (I just love swaps! What could be better than gauranteeing that I’ll get a package in the mail? Getting to pick and send one to someone else, of course!) and this month’s swap was Books. Our Swap instructions were to pick an inspirational book that had affected our lives to send to our partner; let me just say, that was a hard theme, you all know how many books I read and how many I find to be powerful and life altering (if you let them) - it took me awhile to figure out what the heck to send. But, I’m not going to tell you what book I sent yet; my receiver lives in New Zealand and I don’t want to spoil her surpise by leaking it to all of you first.

I will tell you what Delia sent me though. I’ll tell you because it makes me laugh (and laugh, and laugh) at the goodness of God, or the Universe, or whatever you want to call the One who pulls all the strings and works everything out. Delia, I think you’ll LOVE this story!

When I was 21 I started working as a freelance writer (why is an interesting story in and of itself, but let’s try and stay on track here); I took courses, bought books, and started pitching and selling my work. I worked for five years; I was published online and in print, worked for trades and businesses as well as magazines and such. I also started and ran a website called Writing Corner (it still exists today, but it doesn’t look the same) as a resource hub for new writers (it was a popular site, we were featured in Writer’s Digest Top 101 Sites list two years in a row). Then Wakizashi was diagnosed with Cancer, I hit a Writer’s Block I couldn’t overcome, and I walked away from my work. I stopped writing completely.

When I was working as a writer I had purchased a book called Writing Down the Bones (Natalie Goldberg) which I absolutely loved. It’s an amazingly powerful inspiration for anyone who wants to write for any reason. So, when I stopped writing and found out my friend’s sister dreamed of being a writer, I gave/lent her a pile of my writing books - including Writing Down the Bones. (To be honest, I was trying to dump anything to do with my writing life, I actually disposed of ALL my records, ALL my rough drafts, everything. I only have a copy of my biggest publishing accomplishment - a glossy magazine - left.)

Almost as many years after I stopped writing as I had spent writing later I had a huge change in my life; I completely disrupted life as I knew it. For some reason (odd because I hadn’t written anything in the interim, not a single word that I didn’t need to write, no matter how much I wanted to), I picked up Writing Down the Bones from the library and read it. It changed my life. I started writing again - for myself; in fact, I couldn’t stop myself from writing (Natalie’s book is like that). It was Natalie’s book that made me realize that writing, and any creative act for that matter, was a form of Worship - it didn’t need justifying or purpose, simply doing it was it’s purpose. Natalie gave me back my writing, and catapulted me into the creative world that my life and work now revolve around. (I also discovered why I had been blocked, the lesson stopping had been meant to help me learn, and how to keep myself from blocking again.)

That was three or four years ago (oddly enough, the book I sent out, was the other book I was reading at the exact same time which had tag-teamed with Goldberg’s book to send my life spiraling in it’s current direction - weird). A few months ago I picked Writing Down the Bones up again at the library. I now lead a group of women who want to write (online) and I thought it would be nice for me to go through the book again - a reminder of why I always recommend it to them, and an opportunity to mine it for quotes and lessons. I’m almost done reading it (I’ve been reading it in my morning quiet time). The entire way through this book again I’ve been lamenting that I gave it away in the first place. I’ve considered trying to track it down, but knew it was probably futile. I’ve hesitated at buying it again, there are so many other book to buy and I’ve, at least, got access to the library copy. For months I’ve been thinking about how much I wish I owned my very own copy.

So, Delia, Yes I have read the book you sent me, and I love it. Yes, I’ve even owned it. But, I don’t think I’ll be passing this copy on to anyone else, what with the fact that you seem to be a string that God pulled for me. I promise you, it was the perfect choice. (The only other Creativity book I recommend more than this one is The Artist’s Way (Julia Cameron)!) By the way, I love your stationary, it was a gift just to read your note on such lovely paper.

My Present:

Now, someone explain to me how Coincidences work again??

-image-You’ve Got to Read This Book, No Really, You Do!

February 5, 2007 | Read a Book

By: Jack Canfield & Gay Hendricks

I know that the title of this book was meant to refer to the focus of the content - each chapter’s author wants you to read the book they are talking about - but it is immensely true for this book as a whole. You really do have to read this book!

I only picked it up in the first place because of the subtitle: 55 People Tell the Story of the Book That Changed Their Life, you know me and books, I couldn’t resist. “Look, fodder for my “to be read” list (as if the dozens of books already on the list weren’t enough).” Then the joy that the library had a copy and I wouldn’t have to pay the $30 price of a hardcover book. Woo Hoo! (I’m so easily pleased don’t you think?)

Having just finished the 55th chapter/story what I have to say is, Wow. I never expected to like, or so highly recommend, a book like this. I read it a handful of chapters at a time, in between other projects and other books; I wasn’t in any hurry to finish it. Normally, that means there’s something lacking in the book, but actually, it wasn’t that. I found I just couldn’t plow through it. I’d read a few chapters and need to put it down and ponder what I’d read. It turns out, the book is so much more than a list of other good books to read.

I should tell you, I’m obsessed with people. I love people. I find nothing more fascinating and educational than reading and hearing the stories of other people. I agree with Oprah that there is a lot of world changing power in the sharing of other people’s stories.

When I picked up the book I expected it to be a collection of personal book reviews (kind of like this post). A great resource to connect me to other resources. What I didn’t expect was the treasure trove of personal stories. I was shocked by how many of the 55 people listed a fictional book as life altering (almost 10 if you count the poetry book too), and amazed by how the richest truth and fiercest inspiration could be dug out of anything. In fact, two of the books listed were listed because they made very clear to the reader who they did not want to be. It just turned out not to be the cookie cutter book that I had expected to find.

I have to confess, I’m kind of sad I have to give it back to the library (the downside of getting a book for free). I think it might be the kind of thing I’d like to have on hand just in case I need it again. It won’t be the first thing I get, but I’m planning on moving it from the “Books to Read” list to the “Books to Buy” list.

Now, don’t ask what I would say is the Book that Changed My Life, because I have no clue. I’ve been pondering it for awhile now and all that I’ve discovered is that many books have changed my life. The jsut perfect book has arrived at the just perfect season in my life, and everything has been drastically altered because of what I read. I just don’t know which book I could list as “The Ultimate” - yet. I’ll come back when I finally figure it out. What would you pick as the most life altering book you’ve read?

-image-What’s Wrong With Self-Help Books

January 15, 2007 | Get Inspired!, Read a Book

Ok, I confess, I read self-help books. Actually, I read a lot of books that are considered “self-help” books. And to be frank, I don’t really understand what the problem is. I hear that self-help books are looked down on in the general public, kind of like motivational speakers I suppose. But why? Wouldn’t it be true that if people weren’t reading them there wouldn’t be so many of them out there, maybe that’s what confuses me? (Did you ever hear the Junkfood Junkie song where the guy is thought to be a health nut but at night gorges on junkfood, maybe that’s what people do with these self-help books? Mock them in public and then read them in secret.)

I read self-help books because I like some of them. Have you ever looked at the books that get put in that category? Some of them are really interesting. Like all my creativity books (that’s where I found Danny Gregory’s Creative Liscence which is actually on journalling and drawing), books like PostSecret and all kinds of interesting stuff. But I also read self-help books for professional development. That’s where I find books for and by coaches, and books on topics that my clients come to me about, books I will probably want to recommend to others.

Ok, I confess, I’ve met those annoying people. You know the kind; the ones who read nothing but self-help books and are constantly making choices because their books told them to do it that way - and then telling you that’s why they did that. The kind of people who seem incapable of independent thought and have latched onto self-help books as a kind of parental replacement - their own personal decision makers. You know, the annoying people like that; the ones who think you absolutely must read this book or you just won’t be able to function.

It’s too bad though, because despite the piles and piles of junk books out there (yes, I admit, there are lots of crap self-help books) there really are some great books, some truly life changingl books. Which is why I keep reading them. I read books that interest me, and books that others recommend, and books that other books reference as important. Which is why I picked up the You’ve Got to Read This Book book, I thought it would be recommendations for 55 best self-help type books - the classics. I have to say, I’m truly surprised with the list so far.

In the introduction the authors said that they hadn’t even heard of some of the books that were recommended, but they didn’t tell me that the types of books people would list as being life changing would be so varied. So far, at least two, if not three (of the, I think, five) stories I’ve read list fictional books as being the most pivitol in their lives. Fictional! I suppose that shouldn’t surprise me so much.

It just goes to show, the one thing all those “self-help addicts” (the ones we previously discussed, not me) are missing, it’s not the book that changes your life. There is not some magic key, some unlimited truth hidden in a book out there and if you just find the right book with the piece you’re missing in it life will suddenly fall into place. There are many great and excellent books in the world. Many keys, and magical truths, buried in story and self-help. Yes. But life’s answers aren’t in the books, they are in what you do with the book. Overall, the power lies in how you read, not what you read.

I mean, haven’t you read a book your friend (or sister) told you was life changing for her and come out flat wondering what she had been thinking? It wasn’t the book, it was her. Personally, I find there’s a lot of repitition in my life. When I “get” something it’s not generally because I read it in a book yesterday, but because it’s something that’s been coming up (coincidentally) in my life over and over in different ways. So, when I connect a lesson to a book it’s often because that book was a final step - it gave me the words to finally express the thing that’s been floating around in my head all this time. I read it and go, “Aha, That’s It!” Or, maybe it fleshes out a lesson I’ve been pondering, or even sparks a new train of thought, one that takes me in a new direction and starts it’s own train of pondering and coincidences. If you asked me what changed my life, or where I learnt something, I’ll probably connect it to a book, but it didn’t begin, or even end, in that book.

It happened in me. How I read the book and what I did with what I read. It’s not about learning to read, but learning to think. So, yes, I do read self-help books - and I’m not ashamed to admit it. I’m not on some “perfect life, self-help guru” quest though, I’m on a quest to know more, to learn, and to grow each and everyday. Which is why I read every book I read, whether it be about God, or science, or art, or British girls who are addicted to shopping. It’s not the book or the genre that matters, it’s the reader.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go lie down and finish reading a book, or maybe writing something, and have a nap. That way I’ll maybe be well enough to blog tomorrow too.